Silly Cliche's You Learned From the Cradle

OK Shalers,
Those of you that know me know that I can only take so much bad news and Shale in-fighting. It is once more time to "lighten" things with something really silly and inane. What could be any sillier than the cliche's we Southerners learned as children. You non-Southerners (you know who you are) should get a kick out of these. I'll start the list and you all can join in. Let's see how many we can come up with.
1. Tighter than Dick's hatband.
2. Drunk as Cooter Brown.
3. Cuter than a speckled pup.
4. Ugly as home made sin.

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Replies to This Discussion

His mouth's writin' checks his body can't cash.

(This one's been applied to me before,. can you believe that?)
I like that one. Can I use it sometimes?
absolutely
Okay, I'm not a GRITS, but I'm thinking here ... might have to call on my resident E. Tx cliche' guru/neighbor for one of hers, she keeps me in stitches ...
You can be an adoptive Girl Raised In The South! Come on, shoot yer best shot!
"That don't blow my dress up over my head".
5. More nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
6. Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit.
7. I'm still kickin, just not that high.
8. Well cut off my legs and call me Shorty.
9. Busier than a cat coverin up shit.
10. Happier than a pig in shit.
He's (she's) two bricks shy of a full load.
The lights are on, but no one is home.
And numerous other spin-offs and derivatives for not being the sharpest tool in the shed.
Hmmmmm, has one oar in the water?
Ah, you reminded me of my sister's favorite ... "Not the brightest crayon in the box."
Well, shut my mouth wide open.
How bout a one legged man in a kicking contest.

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