Silly Cliche's You Learned From the Cradle

OK Shalers,
Those of you that know me know that I can only take so much bad news and Shale in-fighting. It is once more time to "lighten" things with something really silly and inane. What could be any sillier than the cliche's we Southerners learned as children. You non-Southerners (you know who you are) should get a kick out of these. I'll start the list and you all can join in. Let's see how many we can come up with.
1. Tighter than Dick's hatband.
2. Drunk as Cooter Brown.
3. Cuter than a speckled pup.
4. Ugly as home made sin.

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Replies to This Discussion

He's a half bubble off plumb.
His elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
Don't bring a knife to a gun fight.
Too many chiefs and not enough indians.
Old as grandma's foot and twice as corny.
but my all time favorite is:
I refuse to do a battle of the wits with an unarmed person.
maybe it's as rich as Kroesus (sp). he was a ruler with all the gold. Not to be confused with Midas.
And of course, our GHS motto: DON'T GET STUCK ON STUPID!
In describing an ugly person: If I had a dog that ugly I'd shave its butt and make it walk backwards.
In describing a red dirt road after a rain: Slicker than owl shit.
In describing a person with buck teeth: He could eat corn through a knot-hole.
I'd rather be pissed off, than pissed on.
Loster than a ball in tall grass
She's so ugly she could make a train take a dirt road.
Speaking about a good looking woman on a construction site:
Id knaw on her ass till I got lock jaw, then Id let her drag me to death.
Why are you smilin’ like a goat in a briarpatch?

If brains were leather, he wouldn’t have enough to saddle a junebug.

Well, if that don’t put pepper in the gumbo!

Well, slap my head and call me silly!
If you want something done give it to a busy person.

OR IF YOU WANT SOMETHING TO BE FUN HAND IT TO CATHAUS TO HAVE IT DONE.

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